I've always believed in God, and I've always relied on Him. But the bad news is that I haven't always understood Jesus. Now I've lost the plot!-I seem to be having these doubts about him being God incarnate. I don't know what I believe any more, except that I believe in God 100%. I have trouble in believing that God would become a man. The thought makes me feel insecure! I thought I'd got beyond all this, but when I look at what I know of Jesus, I don't see God, and it worries me! I want to believe, but I often end up seeing a Jewish prophet!
We will never understand Jesus according to any fleshly concepts or appearances, no matter how much we were to dig into the historical settings. Even if we were to go back in time and view his moment by moment lifestyle. One of the biggest things Jesus' own disciples had to get past was that who he was could not be understood by how they knew him according to the flesh. No doubt the testimony of the life of God was revealed, but as Peter was given that miraculous glimpse by which he claimed Jesus to be the son of the living God, it was told him that God's spirit caused him to understand what his eyes could not see!
The reality of who Jesus is has been put within you ... no wonder you lose sight of it as you try to determine who he is by what he may or may not have eaten. Do you remember the words Jesus told Thomas after he professed faith by seeing the holes in Jesus' body? "More blessed are they who believe WITHOUT seeing!!" Those guys had to be given insight by the spirit of Christ so that they could know who he really was, for everything they surmised about him according to their physical contact was of another reality ... a SHADOW reality.
You can never understand Jesus by figuring him out or by gaining more intellectual understanding, for his life is within you and it is only understood by revelation. Jesus was the joining of God and man ... and guess what? YOU now fit that description!! That's right! Because Jesus has prepared the way we have now entered into the very same reality you now struggle to understand. But you will only confuse yourself of the very meaning of that which is also your reality as long as you try to define it or understand it by what can be known by fleshly eyes and ears and brain tissue. :)
When you quote, 'more blessed are they who believe WITHOUT seeing', - I might think, -why all the mystery?
The original statement was made by Jesus after Thomas professed his belief after having seen. The truth was that Thomas' faith was not founded in what he saw either. But he would come to realize that later in his life. He only THOUGHT Jesus' display of the wounds was what caused him to believe, but it was not so. I can only imagine that those words hung in his memory for the rest of his days as he continually came to understand that viewing Jesus by how he knew him in the flesh could never bridge the gap into the miraculous life that exists outside the very framework of what is seen.